Thanks to everyone who have mailed me some lovely things and offered their kindness and support this past week.
After nine cases of tonsilitis over a year, I got my tonsils out last week.
As a singer, I was extremely anxious about changes in my voice and pain, not to mention recovery time and voice rehab. The surgery, albeit a “completely routine and normal” procedure for most people, has been deeply traumatic for me and has sent everything into chaos.
I stayed in hospital for a couple of days struggling with sickness and pain management, and the past week hasn’t been much easier.
I cancelled some work commitments and took some time off RCS in December, in hope to dedicate as much time as possible for recovery. I’m pretty behind on emails and I’m anxious about getting back into singing. Although each day I feel gradually better, I have no “singing” voice at all right now, just breaks and croaks.
I just hope that it will all be worth it, and I won’t have to perform through tonsilitis or worry about getting it mid-tour anymore; scavenging for antibiotics in foreign countries and constantly pestering my bandmate Luc McNally with my complaining about it! I’ve not just felt physical pain, but emotional too. I don’t mean to be dramatic, but it made me realise just how much I love singing and just how I should respect my body more and treat myself with care; instead of pushing through and working through things to the point of physical and mental exhaustion. Our bodies can only take so much. After days of sickness related to being on some strong painkillers, not being able to eat, or even stand up, my weight has dropped to 7.5st, which even for me, being a wee thing, is alarming.
Everything feels a little shakey right now, but it is getting better. I think surgery affects everyone differently but this has certainly knocked me a little. If you’re waiting to hear back from me, bare with me please! I’m now in Huntly and I’m going to rest and recouperate for another few weeks. I’ve got some nice things lined up in January (like a hometown gig in Aberdeen on 26th!) that I can focus my mind and voice to!
Have a lovely Christmas everyone, and thank you for being so supportive in what has been a bloody brilliant but exhausting year for me!